vasoline, magazines, and tangerines

I got to be a part of history Wednesday night. If you are not aware, yesterday in the late afternoon, the Flaming Lips broke Jay-Z's previous world record for most shows played in multiple cities in 24 hours. They started in Memphis, then headed to Clarksdale, Oxford, Jackson, Hattiesburg, Biloxi, Baton Rouge, and finally New Orleans.

I have only really heard one negative review of this mini-concert marathon, so I'm going to deem it successful (as if I hold any authoritative power in the matter). I tried to watch as much of the live stream on MTV as I could, but things like work and sleep and the like got in the way. I'm sure a DVD will be made, so I'll just catch it all then. What I can deduce from reviews, quips, and streaming is that besides Nola and some kickass fireworks, Memphis really got the best show, mostly because we got two shows. 

I'd seen them perform at BSMF 11, though I missed roughly half of their show because 1) The Grizzlies beat the Spurs to win the series at the same time 2) I mistakingly thought Jason Mraz was going to be entertaining. I had heard of the Flaming Lips and their theatrics before, but was apathetic about them performing, and even more, me missing said performance. When I finally caught the second half of the show, I was in complete awe. Not only did they have so many aesthetics, but they sounded great too. I spent much of that first performance entranced, not believing what I was seeing. 

So, now on Wednesday, I was prepared and past the point of ready to see them live again. I don't purposefully listen to their music at home or in the car or what have you. Don't get me wrong; it's good, but for some reason, I just don't. It's the live aspect that enthralls me. It's so unlike anything I've ever experienced in a concert or show. I just smiled the entire time, (and not the cheesy, obsessed with celebrities smile, but the so content with life and everything is perfect in the world smile), and turns out I was not alone in this. Someone next to me turned and said, "Look at the smiles on every single person's face. What other band can do that? The closest I've ever been to being this happy was when I was on opium one time in college." Over-sharing aside, the boy had a point. Every confetti-covered person was smiling. 

With all your power, what would you do?

We're the enforcers, the sorcerer's orphans, and we know why we fight

They rescued everyone, they lifted up the sun

Look outside, I know that you'll recognize it's summertime

We can't hear them singing, but we can hear it as it flies

Smiles all around

Spoils of war.

It was one of those rare moments where I was fully aware of how amazing this world is, that people and music are still of sound quality. Wayne Coyne is beyond words in the best of ways. He was so kind, sincere, grateful, humble. He was thanking us for being there and supporting them, apologizing that the second set would be short and they'd have to flee quickly. He never had to thank me. It was my pleasure; I wanted to thank him. I hate the idea that other cities may not have gotten to experience the same show. Maybe I'm not critical enough, maybe I'm not a true "fan," but when music moves within in you and not outside of you, that's a beautiful thing, and I just can't find any negativity in that. 

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes, let them know you realize that life goes fast. It's hard to make the good things last. You realize the sun doesn't go down; it's just an illusion caused by the world spinning 'round.

baby don't chop me up

I keep dancing on my own.

So, between this studying nonsense, I've managed to agree to run 1/5th of the St. Jude Marathon this coming December as part of relay team. This means that the time to get serious about running again has really already passed, but no matter, I am determined to do it anyway. 

Every run, every mile is a step closer, but sometimes, (especially with this excessive, muggy heat), I don't want to keep going. Know what keeps me going? All together, y'all:  "MUSIC!"

I try to change the playlist weekly, and here's an example of this week's jams:

The Alphabeat--David Guetta 

Hello--Karmin

Teeth--Lady GaGa

Get Over It--Ok Go

LeDisko--Shiny Toy Guns

So what's it going to take silver shadow believer? Spock rocker with your dirty eyes...

The Magnifying Glass--The Joy Formidable 

Laserlight--Jessie J

Go Right Ahead--The Hives

My Body--Young the Giant 

Chop Me Up--Justin Timberlake feat. Timbaland & Three 6 Mafia 

Beekeeper's Daughter--All American Rejects

I still got you waitin.' Look out your window. What do you see? You don't see me

Dancing On My Own--Robyn

Run the Heart--Sleigh Bells

You take a heart, I can take out two. You take a heart, I can take out you.

She's Long Gone--The Black Keys

Slight Work--Wale feat. Big Sean

Two things I don't need are you and my ID.

What do you run/work out to? Any suggestions??

surprise, surprise

I want to fall back in to all we used to represent; wash my filthy hands; wash my filthy hands.

Sorry for the temporary and unannounced hiatus, my few lovely followers; I recently relocated and started studying for my boards. I told myself that I wasn't going to write again until after the testing was over, but here I am. I swear I have done more growing up and maturing in the last three weeks than I've done in the past three years. 

I have my own place. I do things by myself. I am not lonely. I am happy. I AM HAPPY. 

Did you read that? It doesn't even matter that certain things I was involved in fell apart (as is customary). I'm seriously un-phased. I'm a little confused, maybe a bit irritated, but I'm not crying. I'm not upset. I'm perfectly fine, and if you know me at all, this is a big deal. 

At first I thought I did care, so as always, I went to my standby playlist of songs to cope with the pseudo-tragedies of my young life. And generally when this happens, I get very emotional, (think Lifetime movie), but as I went through the songs, I just laughed. I didn't listen to a single song in its entirety. I'll give you some examples:

Heart on Sleeve Playlist:

No Light, No Light (Florence + Machine)

You are the hole in my head; you are the space in my bed. You are the silence in between what I thought and what I said. 

And I'd do anything to make you stay. Tell me what you want me to say.

This Modern Love (Bloc Party)

This modern love breaks me. This modern love wastes me.

Polaris (Jimmy Eat World)

They say that love goes anywhere; in your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there. When you go, I'll let you be, but you're killing everything in me. 

Early Winter (Gwen Stefani)

You, you know how how to get me so low. My heart gave a crash when we spoke. I can't fix what you broke....and I always was, always was one for crying. I always was one for tears.

But that was then, and this is now

Gives You Hell (All-American Rejects) 

Truth be told I miss you, and truth be told I'm lying

When you hear this song, and you sing along but you never tell, then you're just a fool; I'm just as well. Hope it gives you hell. 

Let it Happen (Jimmy Eat World)

I can hear you now. Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk; gotta love how it's somehow all on me. And all the petty scenes and all the pretty things, say whatever you want 'cause I can laugh it off (ha ha ha ha ha ha ha)

Wide Awake (Katy Perry)

I'm wide awake, not losing any sleep. I picked up every piece and landed on my feet. I'm wide awake; need nothing to complete myself, no.

Untitled 7 (Brand New)

Can't hold on to the thrill, so I hope you find your will to follow through. What we invented, I am now  ending. Hold on to who you love. We are dry and blown like dust since we were young. What we invented, I am now ending.

I have to tell you, it feels so liberating to be rid of that sadness, that heaviness in my heart. I want to reiterate that I am not angry or bitter: I'm simply finished with that chapter, (the one you keep reading, telling yourself you'll go to bed once you reach the end, but there's always another page). I'm grateful for the lessons I've learned and the character-shaping I've been privy to, but good grief, I'm exhausted.  

Even on a cloudy day, I keep my eyes fixed on the sun